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-   -   Yeah, I"m still alive (http://forum.yakkityyaks.com/showthread.php?t=18977)

grandmamichelf 06-03-2017 07:04 PM

Yeah, I"m still alive
Let me just say this....I have found that since Armando passed away a little over 3 years ago that my life has changed dramatically. I've thought about suicide. I have thought about retirement. I have thought about all kinds of things, mostly dark and sad.

But I have gotten help and I have taken the steps.

But here's the good news. Alexis has qualified for disability services and we will be meeting on Wednesday to talk to the place where she will be going for day services. She is SO excited. Plus, no more wheelchair. I purchased a rollator walked for her (it has a seat for her to sit in when she tires) and she'll probably start there for 3 days a week, all day long.

Two days ago we were in NYC 3 years ago spreading Armando's ashes. I'm still waiting to go up in the hot air balloon with my boss piloting but the weather doesn't cooperate and I have to find someone to go up with me. No one in my family wants to go except my daughter-in-law and even then she won't go higher than 1000 feet. I need to talk to Armando so 1000 feet just won't cut it.

It's been such a long time since I"ve been here. But life has become too precious and full. I've had so many ups and downs especially at work. My family has pushed at me to retire because I can't get moved to a better pay bracket because of my grieving over my son, my anxiety attacks in that building where the administrators (including my bosses) are, and because of me putting snakes in my boss' coffee cup....whatever. At first I told Matt and Dan I would try to do better. But then I realized...I am not always appropriate. I'm not always a high-falutin' nose in the air kind of person. I can't change to please people just to get in a different pay bracket. It's just wrong. I should be able to get paid based on the merits of my work not the fact that if you ask me a question I just might tell you the fucking truth.

Anyhow, my bosses love me so I don't really care. I'm only loyal to them and one is leaving.

I hope everyone here is doing well and living large. It's a beautiful life when you don't let others try to rule you.

19wingz 06-03-2017 07:27 PM

Grandma! Thanks for the update. What good news about Alexis! I hope that helps with her day to day!

You know we're always here for ya. Hugs!

grandmamichelf 06-03-2017 07:40 PM

Thanks, wingz. Love seeing your travels and experiences on Facebook.

Mystycl 06-05-2017 11:41 AM

well.... just wow!

you sound like michele!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and i'm so happy for that. MICHELE put snakes in her boss's coffee LMFAO! :rofl:

great news for Lexie.. i just know she will excel, she's ready to move forward..
seems like you both are ♥ ♥

Love you...

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